Commitment

So I was looking around the web, and I notice some old friends who are with completely different people...
and I just wonder, how do they just go into such a long relationship than go with someone else right after, and after, and again. Do they not care about who they commit too?
If it were me, I'd only want to commit to people who I know things can go well with...not just anyone cause they look good or whatever.
I've come to conclusion that I'm never really going to find someone worth it around here. Everyone knows everyone. That's the biggest problem, ever.

Commitment is a really important aspect of a relationship...without it, the whole thing is worthless..That's what many people around here lack, and you know what...I'm not one of them.
And another word is friends...someone needs to firm up the definition of friends, because at this point...I'd like to say I have none, lol.

And this blog was just random venting.
This was a waste of my time and yours, I'm sorry.

Promotion

My summer may have gotten a little more exciting because of some news I got last night.
Well, the first little thing I found out was that I was promoted from a 3.0 player to a 3.5 player in the USTA league for tennis. That's good, but in a way bad since I should try to keep my ranking low so I don't have to forced to play at high levels. -_-

So I was asked by a friend to teach some kids how to play tennis for some money, and hey...what else can be more fun than doing your favorite thing and earning money for it? =]
Might be making a little extra cash this summer, and that's exciting.

Let's keep this summer filled with excitement. Haha that sounds lame.
But Busch Gardens, and anything else would be fun?

=]

Thoughts on Paper #2

My first "Thoughts on Paper" post consisted of me just blabbering about random things in my life.
I guess I'm doing the same for this one. So here it goes:

GIRLS
Not really a coincedence that I begin with this topic. Girls girls girls, where to begin? I guess I'm back to my "chilling" stage. I can enjoy my time just as fun with just friends, I will hope to never be desperate for a girlfriend. Another thing I wonder is...Does me being picky, have to do with the reason that I always end up not uh succeeding to get a girl? Random girls add me on Myspace and Facebook, telling me that they saw me at the APICS show and I looked very "stunning"...It's kind of funny, how you're just going to add me cause you saw me. But sadly, those are the only kind of girls I can attract huh? STALKERS. AH!

MONEY
Oh gosh, since when have I been so broke? Haha, I'm getting really poor now and I don't even know how, I haven't really bought anything expensive besides a longboard lately...and I haven't even paid that longboard off. Ugh. I need to start saving money, and this summers going to be the summer that I do. NEW CAR!? ;D The only thing, actually that I spent so much money on was food. -_-

TENNIS
The USTA league has been going pretty well for me, whose undefeated? Shun's undefeated.
;D And our team is undefeated haha.
Go to "national.usta.com" and then search for player name, Shunsuke Araki, exact match and scout me .
=] I feel like once I am able to get my volleys down the way I want, maybe just maybe...I can consider myself a 4.0 ! yay.

DANCE
I really miss dance practice and just everything with Twelve15...I think it'd be a little smart to just start practicing for next year already and just choreograph for fun, I think I could pick up dancing again as a hobby. But right now I wanna get better at...

SINGING
Yes yes, singing is more fun to me than dancing. I've never been musically talented so I'd like to try to better myself at that. Let's jam ! xD

Well, I suppose I'm done with my thoughts for now, I hope the next post is more of an interesting one. =]

Relax Shun

Today...
Actually might have been worse than yesterday.
I wish I could say that girls don't phase me. But I can't, this whole situation has been stuck in mind ever since, and it's slowly starting to take a toll on me.
Now that I think about it, I don't really think that we'll ever be "friends"...
From the start, I feel like we never built that foundation...so when it comes down to this, I think everything kinda crumbled and now we're back at the whole, just a person in the same dance group...which is really saddening.
It doesn't feel right to call, text, or whatever anymore, until I see her.
And I know it's going to be a while till I do...and it's still going to be awkward.
Man, eff it. Eff my life.

Incomplete

Honestly, today was one of the most disappointing days I ever had.
Well, it's past midnight, so I suppose yesterday.
Everything didn't turn out how I hoped for and needless to say, I feel like bleh.

So I guess I'll skip to the most important part...
The news.
Receiving the news straightforward, actually did hurt...but I don't know.
I'm in more of disbelief for some reason. Can't believe everything just fell apart like that.
I'm used to things not working out when it comes to girls and stuff, but it's hard to deal with it every time.
I guess I haven't done the best in keeping girls who I've liked close to me, it's always awkward at first...but with her, I don't want that anymore.
During the talk, it was rather awkward...very uncomforting, but at the same time, in a way...the talk helped us grow.

I'm sorry, I made things awkward...and I'm sorry that I still can't accept everything yet, eventually I will...but for now...
You're still special to me.

The talk went for a while, but at the end...I guess we were able to end on good terms. Good enough terms to go to the movies and chill, however that didn't happen...
So it felt really incomplete at the end
I hope you still wanna go, =/.

Everything Just Feels...

different.

Just a week, not even... a few days ago, I felt this special vibe and happiness...
But what happened to that?
Things can not change that much within just 3 days. =/
If it really did, then that's amazing...but bummer for me.
I'm back to feeling confused and sad.
Was the only reason we ever got so close cause of just APICS?
I need a good talk with her or just time with her.
I'm not giving up just like that, I just can't.

I Like This Girl.

She's super fly, and she beautiful inside and out.
=]]

Really?

I think tonight was the most I smiled in a long time, =].

Chasing Pavements

So I've been asking myself this question a lot lately and in a jokingly way because it's a song,
"Should I give up or should I just keep chasing pavements?"

I think the worst feeling right now that I could feel is uncertainty...and I feel tons of it.
The only thing I can say is, "I don't know what to do."

Is what I'm doing now good or bad ? =/

Oh, keep chasing pavements is what's in my mind, but sometimes man...just sometimes.
But no, I think I'll keep goooooing. Even if it leads no where...

Why?

I seriously wonder why...
Why is it that like 7 out of 10 times when I receive a comment/status thing on Facebook, it's from a RANDOM person that added me just cause I'm japanese or asian or look like an anime or something goshhh.

Let me be specific, why does it have to be HER, I do not like her. And I do not appreciate being liked just because of me being asian or LOOOOKIN like an anime.
GOOOSH!

Oh my goodness, haha.
FREAK!