Deepest Thoughts

There's been a lot going in mind lately and this is the right place to drop it.
Lately, my life's really only consists of work and tennis lately.
Now that I think about it, friends do come and go and when you think about it, whose to say who your true friends are?
As for me, I don't think I have any.
Fuck friends. I want, need friends that are actually there for me and care. Friendliest friends. As stupid as it sounds, that's what everyone needs. I have high expectations for friends and no one seems to be able to fulfill it.

My minds been heavy lately, thinking about my dad, whose going through a rough time with his heart, as well right now. I been thinking about it a lot, hoping that he'll be okay and everything...but it's hard for me to just go through everyday supporting myself. I need people who will support me and care too. But those people who I thought would be those people, didn't really rise to the occasion. I've told my buddy Liz and only a couple others, but I couldn't, and haven't even told my supposedly "bros"...why not? To me, they haven't really been the best of friends to even be comfortable enough for me to tell. We've got one friend who won't even really care and one whose rubbing off on him so he won't care either. Maybe I care too much.

You know, in the end...
Really, I don't know what to do.
So
fuck my life.